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How do you go about caring less what people think while caring more about them? When I say caring less, I’m referring to being less of a people pleaser.
I’m a consummate people pleaser. For as long as I can remember, I have worried about what people think. I peed my leotard in ballet class at age 8 because I cared too much about what others thought to ask permission to go to the bathroom. Yeah. That worked out well.
As an adult and a mother, I am forced to care less. Not because I want to, but because sometimes I have to do things that other people may not like. Having kids has emboldened me in that way.
I want to get better at not caring about what others think. Sometimes I spend so much time inside my head that I talk myself out of doing things because “what will they think?”.
On the flip side, I want to care more about people. Sounds like the opposite of what I said above, I know. But what I mean is that I want to care less about what others think of me, while thinking more about caring for them.
It’s easy to become callous of heart. This world is rapidly moving away from person to person interaction. How easy is it to type something up online and post it, not really thinking about what the person on the receiving end will think? Technology, society and the cultural shift have all but done away with our in-person village. This makes it easier to care less about our neighbor, or the person across town.
I want to change that in myself. To become less callous about the needs of others. I don’t do it intentionally- I’m a people pleaser, remember? But often I’m in a rush, or I am so tired and other people get put at the bottom of my list.
One way I find that helps me to care more about others is by setting aside my technology. It’s easier to overlook someone else’s need when I don’t see it because I’m scrolling through Instagram. It’s also easier to get irritated with the needs of others when I’m in mid-Facebook binge. I have found that when I’m intentional about putting aside my phone and iPad, I can be more attuned to the needs of others.
What are some ways that you have found to care less about the opinions of others while caring more for their hearts?